Saturday, December 31, 2011

It's YOUR Wedding Day!

You've just gotten engaged and you don't have a minister to perform the wedding ceremony.  It won't be long before you start receiving referrals from close family members and there may be a strong expectation that you simply accept this recommendation as the one who will tie your knot. Referrals from friends or people you find on your own usually have fewer "strings attached." 

In any event, remember that this is your wedding day, and while your families are welcome to share their ideas and opinions, the final decision must rest with the two of you. The best way to head off the pressure and expectation to blindly accept the recommendations from your family is to simply thank your family member for the recommendation. Tell them your fiancé may also be getting ideas from his or her side of the family, and assure them that the two of you will choose a minister who is best for everyone concerned.

And while we are on the subject of "pressure"...as you plan the details of your wedding, inevitably you will be told what you should and should not have in your wedding by someone you love very much (and I am not referring to your fiance).  You will be wise to make very clear to all your loved ones early on in the planning process that this is YOUR wedding and it is going to be what YOU want it to be...even if some of the things you want are non-traditional. 

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